quaintly - Latest Comments in Always Your Favourite Girl

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

Gin — Tue, 28 Aug 2007 10:23:13 -0000

im like that ;p

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

alexis — Mon, 27 Aug 2007 23:33:37 -0000

friendship lies in the heart and not in just social interactions and outings. i usually turn down outings personally not because i dont like the group that invited me along, but due to the fact that when people gather, they tend to talk way out of their league and ended up hurting friends you would choose not to hurt. sometimes the problem lies also within the ring. when there's a big group of girls, she may have felt that she was excluded or out of the place due to the number of people that had turned up and also the fact that she has no idea what you girls were talking about as she missed out many of the previous outings. perhaps she just realised that she prefers your company to yourself and not with a whole group of friends where she has no chance to chat with you alone. just maybe...

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

Ringo — Mon, 27 Aug 2007 08:27:18 -0000

About the friend who gets a new boyfriend and suddenly stops spending time with her friends, first of all you need to find out if it's the boyfriend who doesn't like her doing so (which she stupidly obeys), or she's so temporarily infatuated and blinded by her new found love. First one is difficult. Second one will fade as time goes by. She'll realize friends are still the best asset she'll ever have. Now the question is, how to handle a possessive boyfriend of your favorite girl friend? :)

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

amymaria — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 23:58:46 -0000

yeap, i did think of that before but never afraid for that ..coz i used to be alone ..( as others said depends how my frens know the meaning of frenship) ..sometimes i think fren is only to be used for each others ..but im not bias to hv frens ..only sometimes not feel to social ...
n i still hv my family around ,u can said im selfish but who cares i love being w my family n i feel more comfortable w them ..
sometimes why some ppl v closed to their frens / or v socialize w frens coz they dont feel fun or comfortable w their families..they dont know how to hv conversation w them ...depends on what kind of families u been raised up...for me, individual personalities are very much coz by what kind of environment u lived before

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

sheon — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 20:16:00 -0000

well, then i think her problem is that she lacks courtesy :)

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

Miss P — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 14:51:45 -0000

I used to have a friend like that. She did not appear to care or bother to call us(me and my other friends). We always thought that she was an air head until one day after a picnic gathering, she sent me home and I sort of brought up the topic with her. I asked her why she seldom want to go out to hang out with us, or why she didn't bother calling us.

It turned out that she actually tried but the timings were inappropriate and we didn't really give her a chance to explain herself. I was glad that I "confronted" her because now we are such good friends and I would have never known the outcome if I didn't actually try to talk about it with her.

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

Albert Ng — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 13:27:02 -0000

The way you use boycott is so cute it undermines the seriousness of the word.

By any chance, is she a Sagi? Not that I've ever been one big on horoscopes, just wondering.

Also, how frequent is frequent? There are people I can hang out with every two days (but absence is alright, unless we got stories to tell), and chicks I've gone out with which I don't mind not seeing for over a week.

Personally, I LOVE one-on-ones. Having a third person means a lesser scope of personal stories that can be shared.

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

pinkpau — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 12:34:34 -0000

wow so many long comments! thanks so much everyone for the feedback :)

artificially : i think in our case there was no change of mindset - more of we just got tired of being treated like that. i think both parties (us and her) have too much pride, hence neither wants to make the first step in reconciliation. yeah that breaking peace aversion thingy is totally true. happens all the time with us.

michelle : well i think it's selfish if one calls oneself someone's friend, and then dont bother to keep in contact or regularly check if their so called friends are doing okay. the turning down invitations is one thing, but plain not being concerned is another. about the clique thing, well i suppose your friends may have gone overboard with sharing their problems, but sometimes people just want a listening ear or a shoulder to cry on.

nicholas : ya but in this case there is no sincerity at all even when we're being turned down. it's not like oh i cant come because i've got an important event, but more like, oh i cant come cos im lazy.

alvin : but i was not backstabbing! which is why i was so shocked when my friend said that to me. i hardly think it is wrong for me to feel angry and hurt over this incident, and to want to share this problem with my other friends.

prawn : that's a good point you bring up, but she's the type who would have no qualms abt showing sour faces if she's not happy. i think the effort of showing up is probably too much for her. and i dont know if the giving me space is a good thing; there is such a thing as too much space. i just get the feeling she doesnt care.

sheon : yea i have tried to understand it. also tried to talk to her about it but she simply said she didnt like hanging out with us. it was just so blunt, u know. im so pissed off im contemplating brushing her off the way she does us; but then again, friends dont do that do they.

gin : it's not just about hanging out. but this person doesnt bother to even call or check up on us after long periods of not speaking to each other. i dunno lah i just dont think friendships should be like that.

lisa : too much pride to make the first move. argh.

amymaria : haha you are just like my friend then. so here's a question; what if one day you find yourself with no friends anymore because of this behaviour that u exhibit. then what? you wouldnt mind either?

jeff : that's good advice, but it's just soooooo pissing off sometimes that i cant help but feel i've had enough of this. i dont think it's a problem she has with a particular person, but more of a phase she's going thru that she has to deal with herself. i just wish she'd let us help.

pau : yeah i know what u mean, i get like you soemtimes; wanting to be alone and all. but being a friend isnt just about hanging out with others, but also being concerned and caring about what they're going thru. my friend's not like that; she doesnt even bother sometimes. how about you?

michael : sigh yeah im trying to learn that too. there's always a reason.

shen : i dont like this friends come and go thing. it's pretty irresponsible especially since we're all so close. yeah i guess in the end it's all a choice thing. maybe i just need to get over my disdain for her choices in particular.

ven : i donno.. i think as a friend i should persevere in trying to maintain the friendship, more so since the other person is not doing her part.

lydia : she's not like that :) she copes well in big social situations

reallybites : aiyo your friend must have thought you didnt really want to see her and hence didnt mind if she canceled. that must have really hurt for u, tho. i can only imagine! ya definitely two sides to every story. but very shy to ask =(

jun : yeah i got a lot of shit from my friends about spending too much time abroad with martian and as a result not hanging out with them enough. but the difference is that i felt guilty about it and always made sure i emailed or texted or called. and i was always excited at the prospect of hanging out with them when im back. she on the other hand is not like that. i do try often to figure out why she doesnt wanna hang out with us, but i hit walls all the time. ultimately it's quite futile and the only worthwhile thing to believe is the truth straight from the horse's mouth

ashleighhh : glad to be of service :)

songjun : ya but then now got new stories.. haha. so realized it all over again.

fern : you made a really good point about our constantly evolving ideas of maturity :) i think that is exactly the case here.

ionstorm : i wish i could agree with you but no :P she doesnt actively seek out time to spend alone with me. also, she's not an introvert. maybe a little private but not introverted

aya : you and i are totally in the same boat; trying to do everything just so that we dont miss out :) yea genuine girlfriends can be hard to come by these days.

george : we have on a few occassions but she either denied stuff or was nonchalant about it. haha! the internet is god's #1 gift to mankind

wan siong : i happen to think that friendships are worth fussing for, and i also happen to think that if something is wrong, you shouldnt just sit there and tell urself to accept it. cos thats just lazy.

foreverjas : there will always be selfish kiasu ppl :) so dont ask her for stuff anymore.

heartless bunny : that is exactly what im trying to do- accepting her for who she is, and accepting that she just doesnt care abt us as much as we care abt her. sigh. but it's just hard. very one-sided friendship.

karyn : agreed

migz : because i care

razzberry : i have asked her about it, and she did mention that our clique is just annoying to hang out with sometimes. i guess we all have to learn to accept that, and to change if we really want to preserve our rship with this girl. thank u for ur well wishes :)

jeff : loved it. thought it was very exciting and had one of the best fight scenes i've ever seen

nickie : yes im trying to accept that we (i) cant always impose our expectations of friends on other people. i suppose that's not very kind or very realistic. =( sigh.

sarah : i would like to be that real friend. hopefully i can be.

mm : again, i make it 'complicated' because i care. and also because i'm hurt and i want to know what i should do as a result of that.

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

mm — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 07:37:16 -0000

i agree with migz, don't have to make things so complicated lah. if she doesn't want to go out, fine, respect that. catch up with her one-to-one, give her a call . (i.e. if you still want to be her friend)

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

foreverjas — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 07:19:43 -0000

life's tough though . . .

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

sarah — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 05:15:26 -0000

some people just don't like being in big groups. that's what girlfriends are for. a real friend would understand that and not ostracize her because she's more introverted than everyone else and love her for it instead

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

nickie — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 20:23:48 -0000

was gonna tell u i'm kinda like that girl friend of yours, then i scrolled down to the comments and found many similar situations and many suggestions so i guess i'll keep it real short.

i believe she has her reasons to not wanna hang out with the whole bunch. could be like what she once told u (tht ur group was a bit annoyin to hang out with), or somethg of tht sort, or it could be she's just an introvert in nature. prefer having more space to herself. which is perfectly normal dont u think? u can't expect evy single 1 of ur core group of friends to be the same, can u?

ooops its getting long. well. just dont single her out cuz she's different. there's no right or wrong or who's wronger. just accept the way ur friends are, and love them just the same. =) cheers.

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

Jeff from LA — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 20:20:20 -0000

*threadjack*

I noticed that your right hand panel says that you just saw Bourne Ultimatum. How did you like it?

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

raZZbeRRy — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 13:27:20 -0000

I recall once when I was reluctant to hang out with this girl and her gang, I would give plenty of excuses to not join them for outings whatsoever. I didn't mind meeting up with her, one-to-one, but somehow, I had reservations about meeting up with the whole bunch. The simple reason was because we had different mentality and mindsets, and clashing personalities, and while they enjoyed doing nothing that constituted as something, I'd rather stay home or just hang out with some close friends.

Perhaps you are looking too deep into the matter. Speak to her, and ask her to find out where the problem truly lies. Maybe your friendship will end up stronger than how it originally started off with.

And I don't think you were "backstabbing" if you were genuinely concerned about her.

Good luck, and I hope everything turns out well for you!

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

Michael — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 13:01:34 -0000

seems like theres two parties here~ the
"the bunch that organizes gatherings and make invitations" and
"some who like to turn down invitations to have some time alone for any reason"

long name though =.=" cant think of better.

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

migz — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 12:01:12 -0000

why make things so complicated?

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

Karyn — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 11:32:36 -0000

Friends. Must always think about each other.

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

heartless bunny — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 07:49:08 -0000

im in math class right now but here i am leaving comments in ur blog XD

err..seems like there's a lot of people out there like me =.='

i used to always do that.turning down invitations.especially during highschool years.i'd turn out every invitation of hanging out,often just so that i could read at home XD

i dont think it's for selfish reasons.i prefered to stay at home because the bunch of people i hung out with plain waste their time.doing absolutely nothing.go out,drinks,talk craps,n they did this every freaking day.nothing gain,losing precious time.therefore i enjoyed my solitary life.having books as my company.

so i guess,before u got angry at such friend [unless they were rude ungrateful git],just try to view things from him/her angle.what couldve make them isolate themselves.maybe they have their own problems,or the problems could also lie in the people he/she hung out with.

whatever it is,just accept them for who they are with no hard feelings.maybe they need time,maybe they just enjoy being alone,1001 reasons.there will be time when they felt like enough being in the coccoon.when that time comes,u dontve to worry looking for them.they will look for u ;)

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

foreverjas — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 22:00:04 -0000

its jz sucks. a good friend backstab me. cuz she thinks tht im' takin advantage on her when i ask her bout assignments??!! and i score all distinction like her?thta makes two of us?! why life need to be so tough su ann. i'm so down. i know i should jz ignore the shit of her, but i jz can't.its not my fault,wht should i do? u're like Dear Thelma . haha. Dear Su Ann, or Pink Pau.

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

Wan Siong — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 16:51:54 -0000

Ahh~~ Used to be high school problems..
They dont happen anymore as we gradually age..
Because later in life, we'll have mutual respect for each other..
Anyway, when we die, we'll die alone..
You dont want them to "backstab" even when you're dead coz u cant attend any of their outing our party rite?
So enjoy the company you can get instead of fussing for more..

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

george — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 15:23:07 -0000

who needs friends anymore when you have the internet??!

haha

well i guess the group of friends should always try to talk with the stray member instead of jumping to conclusions..that way everything will be revealed

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

aya — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 12:55:12 -0000

i'm the kind that would go all out on an invitation, even if i don't feel like it. rarely turning down offers. :( it makes me feel so tensed up during those outings, but still putting up a smile. reason being, i didn't want to be left out from these outings. maybe it's a silly way to fit in, but i wanted to capture those moments that might last a lifetime too badly.

on the other hand, i think girls make the worst best friends. there's always too much assumptions going on. and before you know it, there's a rumour spreading like wild fire.

i've learnt that.. screw best friends. you only need one or two. others can just be.. friends. too much drama is exhausting.

guy friends, on the other hand, make the best pals. they don't feel sad over not asking them out. they won't feel annoyed if you looked prettier.

but the only thing you need to worry, is the possibility of him falling for you, or.. the rage of the girlfriend la. hahahaha

but then again, lately, a girl can fall for a girl too. the trend is spreading.. =/

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

ionStorm — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 10:10:46 -0000

sounds like a regular case of introvert vs extrovert.

introverts feel refreshed when spending time alone or just with one person. extroverts however feel refreshed when spending time with a group.

i also agree with some of the comments. she might not be very comfortable with the group you hang out with, but she probably likes the time she spends with you. just you.

i'm mostly introvert, and a little extrovert. usually i don't want to see anyone, or maybe just one person but somedays i just reaaally want to go out with my group of friends.

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

fern — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 09:01:36 -0000

....
woah,really terasa

i think i've lost count on how many times i've been through this situation already.

i don't think anyone's at fault. I think that we (young people) constantly change our idea of what is maturity. And sometimes an idea of maturity may keep a social life at the back of our minds just so we can chase some goals and dreams. So i don't think it neccesarily means a friendship has turned sour, i just think the friendship was temporarily forgotten to make room for a bigger picture. (and maybe laziness in certain cases)

Because one day, two old friends can always bump into each other and say "Omg, it's been SO long!!"

i don't think anyone can stop loving a friend, even if they've changed :)

Re: Always Your Favourite Girl

songjun — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 08:32:50 -0000

lol berlambak comment comment i nampak

i thought u had this revelation before?